Leave the smokers alone

I believe I have done enough conservative right-wing bashing for the time-being.

Let me focus on the annoying ultra-liberals. Why can't they leave the smokers alone? They've already succeeded in treating them as outcasts by designating them very little space to puff away. They've banned them from restaurants, bus stops, pubs, etc. Now they are cheering the fact that cigarette boxes will have hideous cancerous pics on them to discourage them.

Let me put my disclaimer first - I am a non-smoker. I never intend to smoke at any point in the future. I believe nicotine addiction is one of the worst. I do not want to lose my voice, my breathing and my independence. But that is MY choice. I do not impose it on anyone.

Instead of rattling away angrily, let me compose myself put down my thoughts into bullets points :-

• Reverse Psychology - Telling someone not to do something so that they go ahead and do it. That is the effect of these non-smoking campaigns and these ugly pictures on boxes. In fact a recent study was conducted on chain smokers and it was found that such pictures increase their craving for cigarettes. It is all in the subconscious - "Why the hell are they trying so hard, why can't they mind their own business, I'll show those idiots that these gimmicks do not work on me". A smoker may not admit it but that IS his thought process.
• Even a teen smoker knows it is bad for him. Every smoker knows what he is getting into. These annoying campaigns keep stating the obvious - lung cancer, etc.
  
• Finally, a person already addicted with full knowledge of the poisonous attack of nicotine in his body does not need a patronizing reprimand. He is miserable already. He got himself into it, let him figure out how to get out, that is if he wants to get out!

It is absolute hypocrisy by the government. On the one hand, it wants to rake in revenues through smoking but on the other hand wants to discourage it. Why does it not ban it if it so bothersome?

If 1000 trilliion people are dying of smoking every year, let them die - they got themselves into it! We cannot blame ourselves for not discouraging them enough!!

OLPS - my school

Personally, I feel I would have been better off in Fatima High school or even if I had continued in MD Bhatia school. Parents (read mom) thought OLPS Chembur was the best option then!

OLPS had its strong points though. The best one being its cosmopolitan nature. There were very few linguistic sub-groups. A Tamil, a Sikh, a Catholic and a Maharashtrian could easily form a seamless group of friends who hang out. I'm glad I studied in that environment without prejudice of any kind against any community. Right now also, as our get-togethers keep happening, that feeling of 'one' community still remains.

Second advantage was the yearly reshuffling of classes. Student were not divided into divisions A,B, C and D based on their merit. It was rather a random process wherein every year threw a different combination of students in a class. At the end of the year, I knew everybody - all 60x4=240 odd students, so I ended up making more friends!

Coffee

I am not an addict and I can, at times, go without coffee or tea for days. But then sometimes I just get those pangs in my oversized head that only coffee can solve. The craving is enormous and I've got to have it!!

Some idiots who call themselves nutritionists say that caffeine helps reduce weight and some other idiots (nutritionists again) say that it increases weight. Now I'm on a half-hearted weight reducing mission and I'm following the moderate argument - "Coffee, if not had early in the morning, does not increase weight".

So now, I'm going to have coffee. My mind says no but my brain says yes, go ahead. If you've understood what I've written in the previous sentence, explain it to me - I may understand it after I have that darn mug of coffee.

2009 - the youth has spoken

April-May 2009 had an overdose of entertainment. The IPL is good but the elections were better. Watching the likes of eccentric politicians like Sudheendra Kulkarni, Navin Patnaik, Jayanti Natarajan, etc can also be loads of fun. But on a serious note I'm glad that UPA has emerged with a thumping majority and BJP has been outclassed and outplayed.

First and foremost, my vote counted. Sanjay Dina Patil of the NCP who I barely know had the privilege of my vote simply because NCP was a part of UPA. I'm glad the uptight Modi-worshippers of Ghatkopar and Mulund couldn't have their way. Their candidate Kirit Somaiya was defeated by a small margin but was defeated nevertheless. I could see the glum faces on Ghatkopar's streets on Saturday evening. They just could not stomach Patil's victory.

BJP - the party I love to hate. Why would any sane intellectual vote for such pig-heads? They are bigoted, opportunistic, noisy, raise petty issues, hail moral policing, openly support hooliganism and worst of all continue to spread false propaganda from questionable sources. They are smug and overconfident too. Their overconfidence cost them 2 elections now.

Worst of all people get brainwashed by unfortunately good orators like Narendra Modi. I despise him but must admit that he can make the most liberal educated person feel like a victim and brainwash him. This time he did not succeed and credit goes to the young voter who saw through the nonsense.

Advani is no better. His crass politics of humiliating Dr. Manmohan Singh hit back at him hard. His only claim to fame is the Ram Janmabhoomi agitation which the youth in India simply do not care about. He is not statesman and he deserves to retire on a losing note.

Varun Gandhi is another 'young' politician who has ironically put off the youth in this country. We want peace in this country which I do not think goons like him can provide.

Worst of all, BJP raised issues which were way past their sell-by date. Bofors-gate 1989, 1984 riots, 1976 Emergency are thing the youth cannot connect with because they have not felt it.

What the youth sees is here and now. It sees Rahul Gandhi doing grassroots work (paid of handsomely). It sees the youth wing of Congress devoid of goons. It sees India growing at 8-9% before recession. It sees rural empowerment. It sees India's measured but effective response to Pakistan post 26/11. The best part is, both the rural as well as the urban electorate has voted for the Congress. It also sees BJP bigots rave and rant about religion, it also sees how BJP wanted to come to power by opposing the nuclear deal - the seeds of which the party itself had sown.

I know I don't have the proof of demographics as to which age group voted for whom. However, I do have an idea of how my generation thinks. They refuse to be thought of as victims of Congress which BJP makes them out to be.

Indian National Congress however is far from a perfect party. It is on the right track however and I hope it remains on that. It should stay away from introducing more unnecessary reservations, show more accountability and stop fielding candidates like Antulay. It should also dump its coalition with corrupt, divisive parties like SP and RJD.

BJP on the other hand should now at least come out of its mode of denial, act as a responsible opposition and give more preference to moderate politicians like Arun Jaitley instead of smug, overconfident jerks like Rajnath Singh. It should also realize that people will remember Modi more for human rights violations than the development of Gujarat.

Honking!

There is a reason people have horns in their cars! And no matter how much the ultra-liberals would want you to believe, they are not for making unnecessary noise!

I have an issue with "No-Honking" enthusiasts. The lame reason of 'noise pollution' does not appeal to me. I'd rather be the cause of noise pollution than be the cause of running over some cheeky 'living on the edge' type pedestrain or biker. Besides, what do you do when those small snail-paced tempos are riding in front of you on a highway in the right-most lane? These anti-noise buggers also would frown at overtaking from the wrong side.

Then there are moderates who say we are only against 'unnecessary honking'. Well, if a person is honking unnecessarily then we have bigger problems than noise pollution. Obviously, his head is not at the right place and he is behind the wheel - 'noise' should be one of the last considerations.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm going to honk when necessary and show the finger to those who frown!

Football

There is a ball, 22 pairs of feet and 2 goals - thats almost all there is to it in a game of football! One of the simplest sports the world has seen. And yet, it remains the most popular sport. I for one, am not fond of it and I have my reasons!

I find it boring! People may say it is the most enthralling game and its the exact opposite of boring but I am not particularly 'enthralled'. The only type of event that happens in the 90-odd minutes of play is the 'goal'. Otherwise you just see the ball going from one end to the other. Give me tennis any day where points keep getting scored or cricket where runs and wickets keep being taken. Scoring points in tennis or taking runs in cricket are more frequent events than scoring goals. I don't want to see hot-headed players banging on to each other, tripping, feigning injury, arguing with the referee and getting all sorts of cards. To be fair to them, it IS a very competitive sport and such things are bound to happen but I don't like to see it!

Playing football is fun although I'm a lousy player. But watching it is exasperating!!

"That was supposed to be funny"

Some people just do not have a sense of humour. I don't mind if people don't laugh at my jokes or don't laugh at jokes I find funny as long as they get the joke. I'm talking about people who just don't get it! They either take themselves too seriously or are too pretentious to recognize odd human traits! Either way, I cannot have a simple conversation with them. They always seem to be on a different plane of thought than me and that is unnerving.

Of course, such people do laugh but then slapstick is just one form of humour. Wit is another form of humour that they seem to get, I have observed. But give them the absurd humour of Gary Larson or the ironical humour of Jerry Seinfeld and they are all at sea! "What was so funny?" they ask! Sarcasm is always taken literally and black comedies are only for 'sick people' according to them!

I'm all for letting people be as they are but I have an issue with such personalities. I have a habit of adding a touch of my own absurd humour in almost everything I say which makes them look at me with pity - "Salil, you need to grow up!". I should respond by telling them that they need to add one more dimension to their thinking! Uptight little buggers!!